Emery May Walker

The birth of Emery May

I am the most horrible blogger, but my life doesn't allow for a lot of time to do it.

Which makes me super sad, I want to remember all these memories.

I want to remember Emery's Birth, so i'm gonna start with that!

Thursday April 4th I had my 38 Week appt.  My doctor was out of town, so I was seeing one of his partners.  At my 36 week, and 37 week appts.  I was dialated to a 3 and 70% effaced (by Dr. Wards measurements,)  So i was so worried going into my 38 week appt. with a different doctor, she was going to tell me I was only a 1 or 2.  Which all you moms know would be a huge disappointment.  

But no I was a 4 and 90%.  I was so excited, only down side , was my doctor was going to me out of town for another couple days.  Which I was shcduled to be induced in a couple days, but that did not work out as planned.  

So I went home, called my friend Denise who was also pregnant, and scheduled to be induced in a couple days as well,  and told her my stats, and she told me hers,  She was the Exact same as I was,  4 and 90%

So we talked, and planned to go walking later that night, to start our labor.

We walked around our neighborhood, I think 3 times.  Before going our seperate ways, we both told each other that "if you go into labor and I don't, i'm gonna be ticked!"

Well.....It all started around 2:45AM,  I woke up for some reason, I didn't know what woke up me at that point, I wasn't in pain or anything.  and then a few min. later I woke up again, and couldn't go back to sleep.  I realized I was contracting. So I decided to time them, at this point I for sure knew I was contracting.  They were 4 min. apart.  I didn't want to be that lady that goes to the hospital and gets sent home, so I stayed home and timed them for an hour.... I then decided to wake Zach up, and let him know that it was time.  That we needed to start heading up to the hospital.  

Well he decided to take his time, He stayed in bed for a few min, and kept asking if I was sure, then he decided he wanted to hurry and shower, which was fine, because we had to wait for his sister to get there, so she could stay with the kids.  But by the time he was done and ready to go, I could barely walk.  I was contracting every 3 min.  and they would last about 1min 15 sec.  So I had to stop alot, and breathe through them.  We finally got to the hospital around 530.  They checked me  and I was only a 5.  But I was For sure ready for the epidural. 

So at about 630 I got the epidural put in.  After that my contractions started to really slow down, I think they were 7 or 8 min. apart. so my doctor  (my doctors partner) decided to break my water and start me on pitocin.  Which sped things up a bit.  

For some reason I kept getting really sick, I had to be laying down pretty flat not to feel really dizzy and lightheaded.  At one point I was feeling really nauseated and thought i was going to pass out.  So the nurses came in and gave me some oxygen, and laid me down.

The sad thing about it, is sense I was feeling so crummy, I don't remember a lot of what was happening.

 At about 10 I felt like I was ready to push.  So they checked me and was a 10, but I still had a little bit of a rim, i wasn't totally thinned.

About 15 min. later they called the doctor in, the rim was gone, and I was ready to push.

I absolutely LOVED this doctor, she was so considerate of all my needs and wants.  She made sure I was getting my perfect delivery.  

I started pushing, I think i pushed 4 times and the head was crowning, so she asked if I wanted to reach down and feel my babies head ( which may sound super weird, but it is such a special thing) So through the next push I reached down and felt her coming out.  It was such an amazing experience.  

Then I pushed a couple more times and she was out, they put her right on my chest (which i LOVED) and i heard her little cry for the first time, and I knew I was smitten!  

This delivery was a little different, I had two other children to worry about as well.  I had Aubrea bring them up, so they saw me right before I delivered,  We explained what was happening today, that they were going to have a new sister, and that she wouldn't be in mommy's belly anymore. Then Aubrea took them out to the waiting room, While i delivered, and then after they cleaned me all up, I had them bring Kypton and Bronco right in, so they could kind of understand what had just happened.  

It was so beautiful to see them meet their little sister for the first time.  Kypton LOVED her,  He just wanted to hold her, and never give her up.  It was so sweet.

Bronco on the other hand didn't want anything to do with me, or baby.  I think it was really hard for him to see me hooked up to all those machines and in a bed like that.  It broke my heart. I cried everytime he came to visit because he wouldn't come to me.  It got to the point that I didn't want him to come visit, because it just broke my heart too much. 

But now he is totally in love with her and can't get enough.  He is constantly giving her kisses!  And lucky for me, he still loves me and wants me all the time.  

Here are some pictures...I'm sure none of this makes sense.  Its sad to me that its all a blur, sense i really didn't feel good.

We LOVE our little Emery Girl!!

Birthday Boy

One year ago today, My sweet little Bronco entered into this world! 

My life has been forever changed!

Bronxy boy is such a happy, goofy, loving, special little boy.

He def. adds a special piece to our family puzzle, and I love watching him and Kypton interact so well together.  You can tell just by watching them together, how much Bronco adores his brother, and looks up to him. 

some fun things Bronco is up to

Walking

Screaming (he is a screamer, not in an angry way, but in a fun attention getting way)

Says MaMa, DaDa, Dog, Ball

Signs Milk, All done, and Dog

has the Cutest giggle, especially when playing with his daddy

isn't liking baby food anymore

super picky eater, pretty much eats waffles, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and bananas EVERYDAY!

he is my little brown haired cutie, I love having a blondie, and a darky.

Makes us so happy!

Happy One year Birthday Bronco!

Can't wait for many more to come

Motherhood

My mind is exploding, and emotions are high, and i'm hoping its just because i'm pregnant and not because i'm really going crazy!

I'm hoping other moms will read this, and PLEASE leave your thoughts and advice.

As i'm preparing to bring another child into this world, and into our family I can't help but reflect on my life right now, and question how i'm going to do it.

I feel like I can barely handle the 2 crazy boys that I have.

For the most part I feel like i'm a good mom, I know they're taking care of, and they are happy,  But I don't feel like i'm living in the moment.  I feel like i'm running through the motions of life, but not taking the time to enjoy it.  It makes me sad. 

I'm one that has always enjoyed life, I have a LOVE for life. And I'm one to not let things get to me, i just go with the flow.

Being a mom is by far the HARDEST, Most REWARDING thing i've ever done.  

And i'm NO pro at it,  I try to do my best.

And I really don't want to take this time for granted, because I know it won't last long!

I need to take a step back and not let the stress of everyday life ruin these precious moments I get to have as a stay at home mom.

So as I prepare for Sweet little Emery to come into this world,  I'm going to focus on enjoying everyday, and not just go through the motions of What motherhood brings, and being a housekeeper and wife brings.

I've let it overtake me, as if i'm drowning. 

Motherhood is such a special blessing from my Heavenly Father, Its hard but its precious and rewarding. 

I'm grateful I live in a community where there are so many other moms in same situations, that I can turn to and ask for advice, or even talk to, and know that i'm not alone in this journey!

Here are some Pictures of my Most valuable treasures. . . 

Really Moms that read this, I'm hoping you will share your thoughts and feelings.

Its always nice to know your not alone!

New Year New starts

Wow, Its been a super long time sense i've posted!  But I'm starting to realize how important it is to keep up on my blogging.  I'm gonna look back and feel like i've missed out on so much.

My goal is to not make my 2nd and 3rd kid feel like I forgot about them, and don't care what cute things they are doing....because I really do.  I'm just more busy now!

Yes I did say 3rd KID!!! I can't believe it either.  We will be welcoming little Emery Girl sometime around April 17th.

I'm really excited for a little girl to be running around in this crazy house of ours, but i'm also really nervous! 2 Kids is a lot to handle, especially when your husband works and goes to school more than full time,  so 3 kids i'm getting pretty nervous about!  

I'm really excited for Emery to have 2 big brothers to protect her.  That gives me lots of comfort.

I'm not going to try and catch up or else I will feel super overwhelmed and probably give up.  So i'll start fresh from right where we're at in life!

I'm 26 1/2 weeks pregnant,  I feel GREAT.  No major problems

Kypton is 2 1/2.  He is at such a fun age!! He is still obsessed with sports, his favorite being baseball and basketball.  Thats all he really talks about.  He is talking a ton. I would say he pretty much can carry on a normal conversation just like any other human being.  Its so fun to hear all the funny things he picks up on.  My favorite being "Oh Shit"  I know it shouldn't be my favorite thing he says...but its all in innocence.  And he only says it when he is playing "sandlot"  He'll pretend to throw a baseball over the fence, and have "the Beast" chase him.   He's so much fun and brings so much happiness and laughter into our home!

Bronco is 10 months old.  He is growing up too FAST!  He is such a good kid, I couldn't ask for better babies.  He is so happy, and sleeps so good!  He has just found his tongue, and loves to make awesome noises with it.  He is such a mommies boy, which I LOVE!  He has such an independent personality, I try to give him lots of cuddles but he just wants his own space.  He is Def. a little home body.  He stresses and gets auntsy  when were anywhere but home, and as soon as we get home he is so happy, and crawls around as if he owns the place.  Kypton and Bronco are still trying to get used to each other.  Kypton is quite sure how to interact with him....kyptons way of interacting is to tackle and wrestle and play sports.  He doens't quite understand that he is still just a little baby.   Bronco puts up with a lot, i'm sure he'll be a tough little guy!

( My computer decided to stop working at this moment, so pictures of Bronco to come!)

Cheers to a New year, and Hopefully I can keep up on my blogging!  Even with adding a 3rd child to the mix! I'm gonna try really hard!!

a look into the not so glamorous side of motherhood. . .

Often times reading blogs, it makes life look so perfect. And most the time its not far from perfect. . . Everything I wanted and dreamed of. But those dreams have the Not so good sides too. 

So as perfect as my last two post have my life seem, let me just give you the other side to my life.
Today I feel very lonely. A single mom. With Zach going to work at 630am and school till 10pm.  I struggle!  How do I juggle two kids? How do I give kypton the attention he once was used to, while Bronx is screaming to be fed.  How to comfort Bronx while kypton is throwing a fit for not letting him go outside when it's dark outside. How to get kypton in the bath and to bed, while Bronx is screaming from a belly ache.
How do you do it? I don't know what the heck im doing? And how to do it alone?
As hard as today as seemed, I know it will get better, there,s always tomorrow to try a little harder.

Sorry if this doesn't make sense.  My emotions are raw and at the surface.
MOTHERHood is hard, yet I wouldn't choose to be anywhere else. 

Im learning everyday, and hopefully kypton will understand that im doing my best to divide my attention equally. And that I love him just as much as I did before, if not more! And hopefully Bronx can feel my love for him, and not just my stress. 

And besides all that, I hope at the end of the day when Zach is home, he can feel my love for him, and not just all my crazy emotions. 

"Be Calm & Carry On"

A Family of FOUR, a Mother of TWO

                                        

Kypton has always been PERFECT in my eyes, and I didn't think I could LOVE him anymore then I already did. . . But there is something about him being a BIG brother, that warms my heart, and brings on a whole new LOVE. 

I LOVE being a Mom of TWO, and a Family of FOUR!

The Birth of Bronco

I don't even know where to start!  This birth couldn't have gone any better.  It was a MILLION times easier then the birth of Kypton.  It was everything I could have imagined, and more! It was simply PERFECT!

At my 37 week appt.  I was dialated to a 3, and 70% effaced( moms will know what that means)  so I was def. getting ready for this baby to come.  My doctor scraped my membranes a little bit, to help me make some more progress.  At 38 weeks I went back in, and was about the same.  My doctor this time scraped my membranes again, but this time my water broke while sitting on his table, at my appt.  So instead of planning on going home, we went straight over to labor and delivery.  All this happened around 830.

So we got over to labor and delivery, got all settled.  Called my mom and Zachs mom to let them know what was going on.  At about 1030 they got my iv going, Pitocin going, and also an antibiotic( i tested Strep B+) Around 145ish the nurse checked me, and I was a 6 and 90%.  So I was thinking it was gonna be a couple more hours or so.  At around 215, I started getting emotional and scared.  I told Zach that I was starting to get uncomfortable, and that I thought I might need to push, to go and get the nurse.

The Nurse came in and checked me, and I was COMPLETE and babies head was close.  So the nurse called my doctor.  My doctor told her that I needed to try and go 20 more min. or so, to make sure I got all of my antibiotic, so that they didn't have to do any blood work on bronco. ( the antibiotic has to be in the body for 4 hours)  So I of course Held through my contractions.  That is NOT a fun feeling! I wanted to push sooo bad!  My doctor finally got there around 240, I pushed through 2 contractions, and little Bronco Zachary was HERE!! It was such a Beautiful Birth, and everything went perfect! 

I will let the pictures speak for themselves!